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Riot in Ohio
National news
reports have
reported that the riot at a Wal-Mart Store in Ohio that happened on Friday, November 25
started when too
many people were trying to get the best deals.
Hundreds of Ohioans stood in line before
sunrise determined to catch
some of the bargains on Black Friday, the traditional kick-off to the
holiday
shopping season. The sad news was that a
few people were hurt, some seriously.
Dump York sources
from Ohio
report that the police investigation are centering around one
particular
individual who is believed to have started the stampede.
While these sources are not 100% sure of the
identity
of the individual, she is described as small, dark haired and carrying
a bag
with D.Y. initials. Based upon leaky
police
sources, it is believed that Denise may have started the riot. Witness described her as a bargain bully. Film from the riot shows a rampaging female in
search the perfect bargain, elbowing her way through the aisles and at
one
point, she steps on the back of a 79 year old woman.
Behind this mad madam was seen a rather large
dumpy male who was seen picking up pennies.
If this is true,
the old
Rude Dude needed to find out more. Heck,
I had heard that Denise shopped at Wal-Mart, but I had never heard
described as
a bargain bully. So I went to find my
good buddy Jed to see what he knows.
I found Jed passed
out on
his front door step, which is a common occurrence.
After I gave him a swift kick, he rolled over
and groaned. Jed looked like he had been
on another one of those weekend benders where “Wild Girls” has been
filmed.
Jed started
muttering something
about the luck of the Irish. Jeez, I
wish Jed would remember not everyone likes Notre Dame, so I interrupted
him by
asking about where his family was hiding.
“Mom is back in Ohio, she heard that there were bargains
galore at Wal-Mart. Dad stayed behind to make sure she didn’t
spend too many pennies.”
So, there could be
some
truth to these reports. Stay tuned for
further news from Ohio.
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November 29,
2005
Talk back to
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